Some Time To Fall Apart
by Sunbird Riding Shotgun
Summary: The loss of their father will bring this family closer together but first they will need some time to fall apart. Post Hiatus
1. Week One: Waking Up

**A/n of the Ram:** One in Four readers never fear. I have not abandoned you. Gibbs is just angry at me and refusing to talk to me and since I really need him for the next chapter it's kinda making things difficult

**A/n of the Boar:** This is sort of a prequel to my story Phylum Cnidaria, although you can read them in any order or only read one.

**A/n of the Tiger:** This is going to be eight chapters long, each chapter taking place over one week, starting from the night Gibbs left and going to the beginning of Shalom. Abby – Tony centric but in a sister/ brother way.

**Eight Weeks**

Abby didn't go home from work the night Gibbs left. She stayed in her lab finding and photo-shopping pictures of him until she passed out in her chair sometime before four in the morning.

Tony knew this because that was the time he went down to her lab to barrow her futon figuring he was the only one who hadn't been able to leave NCIS.

Abby had woken up when he came in, blinking fast and waving her arms in what Tony could only assume was ASL for that little "huh! What?" you make when startled into wakefulness, or maybe she'd been reaching for something. He couldn't tell.

When she recognized him, saw the bags under his eyes and probably the same too shocked to react look she had on his own face the half moment of desperation she'd woken up with changed into numbness again. "It wasn't a dream was it?" She asked.

He shook his head and wordlessly sat on the edge of her desk. The entire team was shaken but it hit both of them especially hard. Gibbs had been like a father to them, though he treated them differently they both had an unspoken understanding about it even before the rest of the team had joined.

Now they found themselves falling into the roles that shared father figure had given them by default. They both didn't know how to deal with the loss of their father, but suddenly they were desperately glad they had a sibling left who understood why they couldn't leave the building. Why they couldn't walk out those doors.

There was a ghost of Gibbs presence lingering as long as they held onto the dream that it was simply a misunderstanding. That he had gone home, or maybe was waiting for them just outside those doors. As long as they stayed here they could pretend that they were just pulling a very long all nighter and that it simply wasn't time for Gibbs to come in yet.

Leaving meant they'd have to return. Returning meant they'd have to admit Gibbs wasn't coming back.

Right now neither of them could take that.

Tony stood and dragged the futon out of it's storage place. "Get some sleep Abby" He told her. When she didn't move he went to her, more than ready to exchange his numb shock for whatever else he could have, even uncharacteristic concern for his occasionally annoying little sister. "Come on Abby, you need some sleep."

"Can't" She muffled.

"Why not?" He asked, brows furrowing.

"I'm phylum Cnidaria."

Only Abby would do this to his poor overstressed brain. "Your not allowed to be a Jellyfish." He muttered helping her up. It was only then he saw the half empty bottle of pills she'd dropped to the floor.

"Abby!" Tony said turning her to face him while helping her to stand.

"Sleeping pills Tony." She said, eyes drooping slightly. "Only took two." She whispered falling against him. "Didn't want to dream."

He helped her lie down but by then her arms were locked around him, pulling him down with her. Realizing breaking away from her would probably wake her up he relented. He needed sleep, and this comfort, as much as she did.

Besides, what better way to be there for her when they woke up from this dream?

They woke up later only to find that the director had taken their team from active duty for a week to allow for adjustment and given them the day off.

Tony was on his way back to the lab after taking care of necessities and trying to figure out how to get a Caf-Pow for Abby without leaving the building when he found out they weren't the only two members of the new team Dinozzo still at NCIS despite being given the day off.

He ran into Ducky in the halls, who for once had almost nothing to say other than a greeting. They had been walking away from each other for nearly thirty seconds before Ducky turned, took Tony's arm and showed him a refrigerator in a conference room on the floor below the bullpen.

He wasn't sure what Ducky was getting to until he saw the three iceless ¾ full super-sized Caf-pow and the half full bag of ice stashed in the freezer. "Special Agent Gibbs kept a stock of these for when he didn't have time to go out." Ducky sighed. "Though I suppose they've gone flat since he last restocked."

Tony wasn't sure how to react. This little revelation about the level of attention to detail, attention to detail for Abby, keeping the ice separate and no doubt mixing it himself so it would be just how Abby liked it took him by surprise.

Any other time the fact that it was the only expired yet untouched food in a fridge every sign showed got a good deal of use would of made him smile. He could only imagine how scary Gibbs would be when confronting the person responsible for the theft of Abby's Caf-Pow.

Ducky left him standing there, apparently not quite ready to deal with others so soon. It was a long moment after Ducky's departure before Tony acted, making up his mind as he did so. He removed the Caf-Pows from the fridge with a almost reverence, like they were relics of an age gone by, emptied them in the water fountain and stacked the cups. He left them sitting in the back corner of the fridge, a reminder to himself of the promise he felt like he was making now.

Abby needed looking after. He remembered the wreck she was when he first started working at NCIS. She'd done well to hide it, after all she'd been hiding it most of her life, but he'd seen the odd edges to her personality that weren't completely just quirks. He was new then though, and Gibbs was already starting to help her through whatever her problems were before Tony was hired. By the time he and Abby had gotten close most of those odd edges had been smoothed out with the same skill and care the man who'd done it used on his boat.

But he'd seen it in her eyes last night, and this morning. He'd seen it in the way she'd been reluctant to let him leave the lab earlier. Gibbs had treated the symptoms and maybe put the disease into relapse but whatever had caused it was still there and Abby knew it. She'd been too numb to grieve the loss of a father, but her mind was still working well enough to fear what the loss of that support might cause.

Tony closed the refrigerator with a thud, these memories and thoughts passing in a few breaths time as he made up his mind. When the father failed the older brother would step up and take charge. He was taking over one job Gibbs had left behind. He'd take over this one as well. He'd keep her smiling, keep her safe, and keep her sane.

He thought back to that carefully placed cache of Caf-Pows, then to the simple joy they had brought her and Tony almost wondered if it wasn't the drink but the gesture that she loved so much.

He just hoped he would do half as decent a job as his predecessor had. He gathered his nerves, grabbed his keys and left. The weight of a tray of Caf-Pows to restock the fridge made the return to NCIS without Gibbs a little easier. He had a job to do. He had someone to take care of. That would get him through today.

He'd worry about the other stuff tomorrow.

Abby had gone home that night. He'd offered to drive her to work the next morning before she could even think to ask. They got strange looks from security as they walked in hand in hand. It was only after watching them a moment one realized they seemed more like a big brother walking his scared little sister somewhere than the sweethearts they'd first appeared to be.

Tony had stayed with her until she was settled in her lab and hung around until he was sure she was going to be okay by herself.

It had been the next night when he was woken up by his telephone at three a.m. It wasn't the first time, Gibbs didn't have a problem with waking them up at ungodly hours for cases. It was the realization that Gibbs was gone, and possibly his own developing gutt that made him race to the phone.

It took a moment for him to recognize the voice on the other end of the phone. Abby was either laughing hysterically, hyperventilating, sobbing so hard she couldn't breath, or quite possibly a mixture of the three. Tony had barely made out "At NCIS" before he'd told her he was on his way and left.

There was a reason Ziva's driving no longer scared him after that night.

The scene he found when he arrived in her lab would haunt his dreams for months.

Abby was on the floor, one pigtail undone, a bottle of bourbon like Gibbs drank empty right next to a spilt bottle of small long and thin pills. She was laughing and crying at the same time, a arm draped over her eyes like she was trying to block out the light. The red stein spreading over her lab coat where her other arm was curled against her stomach spurred him into action.

"Abby!" He cried, stumbling forward to kneel next to her. Feeling a weak but steady pulse at her neck he moved her arm from the injury on her stomach only to have his horror raised a notch when he found the blood was from deep cut on her arm.

He didn't need to see the razor drop from her other hand to know what had happened.

He cursed under his breath, dialing Ducky before he knew what he was doing. "Ducky!" Tony began once Ducky had answered the phone.

"Abigail?" He asked, Tony could guess easily enough how the doctor knew why hw was calling. "I'm on my way. How bad is it Jethro?"

Tony swallowed hard, that slip up of the names made his gut twist wondering how many times this had happened. "Ducky" Tony said, his voice softer than he meant.

It took Ducky longer to answer than Tony had ever experienced. "I'm sorry. How is she Tony?"

"She mixed bourbon with Vicoden." Tony said, reading the pill bottle but already guessing what it was. You learned strange things from watching House. He wasn't even going to wonder how she'd gotten her hands on vicoden right now. "She's hysteric." Tony continued, cradling the phone between his cheek and shoulder as he psyched himself up for what he was about to do and say. "She hurt herself Ducky."

Another long silence and Tony forced himself to find the first aid kit he knew was in her desk somewhere and begin cleaning and caring for the cuts on her arm.

"I had guessed as much Anthony." Ducky admitted with a sigh. "It's a habit she had when she came to us I'm afraid. Jethro helped her stop but I feared she would relapse before too long now that he has left."

Tony sighed gently pushing Abby's good arm back to her side. "Then I'll help her stop again." Tony said before he even realized it was what he was thinking.

"God I hope so" Tony thought he heard Ducky whisper. "I hope so."


	2. Week Two: Campfires and Cases

**Crouching A/n Hidden Dragon:** ... I can't think of anything to say but I've never posted a chapter without a A/n before so um... I got it! Dedicated to the people who've shown their support for this fanfic through Story Alerts, Aouthor Alerts, Reviews (and reading it) you're awsome.

_No elevators were hurt in the making of this fanfic_

* * *

Later Tony would remember little else of that first week after Gibbs left. A memory of Ducky taking over Abby's care the next day and an agreement between them to keep it quiet for the moment, coupled with Abby's refusal to even admit something had happened would be his last distinct memory of slowly waking from the last phantoms of the dream Gibbs was still there.

And then suddenly, a week to the day from when Gibbs had left it was as if they all woke up, screwed their courage to the sticking place, and took their first tentative steps forward.

Tony took an extra minute to make sure he looked sharp before leaving for work, something he hadn't had the mental energy to worry about for weeks. He and Ziva arrived at the same time and were teasing each other mercilessly once more by the time McGee arrived and they made a unspoken truce to attack the probie.

If the jokes weren't as good, the comebacks not as sharp, and the laughter a little forced no one commented. They were proving to themselves they could go on like always without Gibbs.

His desk became a shrine to their lost leader and no one, not even the janitors to empty his trashcan, touched anything in the little corner of the bullpen where they could still almost feel him, looking on their bickering with raised eyebrows like a father almost mystified by his children's antics. Every so often a shadow would move, a chair would creak, and they'd glance over flinching for that head slap they knew they deserved.

They had finished all their paperwork in the previous week, drowning their shock with endless files. It meant until a new case came up they were being paid to sit around and enjoy each other's company. The companionship did much to ease the ache they felt every time the elevator doors dinged open and they all rushed to pretend like they were working until they realized they had nothing to fear.

It was a little before noon when Ducky appeared with Abby, or at least Unabby, in tow. They sat at Tony's desk and when Ducky began telling a story Ziva and McGee pulled their chairs over to listen. With Ducky in the center of their little circle telling a tale of why he would never play tennis again Tony was reminded of a campfire in cowboy movies. Close friends huddled together for warmth and comfort against the cold and lonely night.

When Abby rested her head against his shoulder, bridging the distance she'd been building between them since that night the week before Tony wrapped his arm around her thin shoulders and felt something within him ease a little. They'd survived the fall, and the sudden stop at the end. It was time he started to try to pick up the pieces of this team.

It was as he was thinking about this that Director Shepard called from the stairs. "Special Agent Dinozzo?"

He gave Abby's shoulders a little squeeze before standing. "Carry on the campfire team." He ordered with a grin before heading to meet with Jenny.

A new mission? Tony thought as he walked back down the stairs to the bullpen. He was the new team leader, he was helping Abby, and pulling a team back into a family. Did he have time or mental energy for another mission?

He'd think about it later. She'd given him two days to decide. For the moment he was more concerned about the new case, his first case as leader, they'd been assigned.

He approached the group still sitting around the imaginary campfire as Ducky continued to tell them adventures from his wayward youth.

"I hate to break this up but we got a case." Tony said, already filling them in on the details as MeGee and Ziva went back to their desks. "Grab your gear. We're going to the crime scene." In moments he was leading them out.

He could see the hint of doubt in both their eyes as they flicked to a certain empty desk before leaving the bullpen. He prayed he'd do this right.

It wasn't until everyone had gone home that night that Tony slipped into the elevator and slammed the emergency stop button. He resisted the urge to shout in frustration by pounding his fist against the wall.

He'd screwed up. He'd really screwed up. He'd misread the evidence, used the wrong interrogation tactics, tried to do too much, and nearly gotten both MeGee and Ziva killed in the course of a two day investigation. He couldn't do this! He needed Gibbs. He needed his advice right then.

He needed his father, not his real one but the one who'd always been there for him since he came to NCIS. He needed his father like no grown man should.

His cellphone rang, the ring tone telling him it was Abby calling. He was on the phone in no time, prepared to shut down his self-depreciation and take care of her when her voice stopped him in his mental tracks. "Look Tony I'm tired. Can you turn the elevator back on so I can take it out of here? You can continue your pity party afterwards."

Without replying Tony switched the elevator back to operational. The doors opened to an Abby who actually looked more concerned than pissed. "McGee told me what happened." She said to him with a sigh, raising a knowing eyebrow at him. "Don't make me go all Gi-" her voice cracked as she mentioned his name but she pressed on. "Gibbs on you Tony. I almost have his pointed silences and inquiring stares down pat. I can make you feel better if I need to." And without another word she flung herself forward to hug him. "I know you'll get this soon Tony. You're good like that."

"Abby… can't breath" He managed to strangle out after a moment when the hug started choking him. He didn't acknowledge her words but he knew he didn't have to. She knew just what to say and probably knew she knew it. His insecurities weren't all gone, he doubted there were words enough in the world for that one, but he felt like another little ache in him eased as another piece fell back into order.  
Abby's faith in him was unshaken, even if he wasn't sure about himself for the moment. Her faith was enough for him.

The case took another two days to solve. It was probably a day more than it would of taken under Gibbs' lead since the team showed it's most awkward edges when it came to their actual work. With each other they could just act like Gibbs was just in the next room over.

With a case to work on they had to relearn their roles in the team. Ziva began taking over interrogations where Gibbs had done so before. McGee became more swamped with the grunt work of cases he'd once shared more evenly with Ziva and Tony.

And Tony still was trying to learn to be the leader he'd never dreamed of becoming. It had been nearly two weeks since a head slap had fallen in NCIS and Tony was beginning to wonder if he'd ever feel comfortable enough to deliver one himself.

Another case appeared the day after they finished the first and it looked like they'd be working weekends again.

Still Tony made sure to find time a few times a day to venture down into the Lab to pay Abby a visit and give and receive the comfort that companionship (joking or silent) provided.

It was two days until they entered the third week A.R. (after retirement) as Tony was beginning to think of it, wondering if he'd always measure time since Gibbs had left, when the director introduced Agent Lee to the team.

He'd done his best, they'd all done their bests, to welcome her into the team with open arms. It wasn't her fault Gibbs had quit and they remembered what Ziva's early days had felt like.

But it was hard not to resent her, and Tony put her at the desk on the end rather than having everyone move desks.

No one was ready to put Gibbs' desk back to use quiet yet.

It was that night Tony was awakened early in the morning again by a phone ringing. He'd picked it up, took Abby's distress call and took precious minutes to try to get through to her, finally gaining a promise that if he hung up and called on his cell she'd answer.

When she did answer his call a moment later he didn't give himself time to be relived. He was on his way to NCIS before he'd even realized he should keep her talking.

He tried to get her to talk about what was wrong, but when that failed he switched tactics, talking about the case they'd just started on, ordering her to recall the details even telling her to double check a set of results. He was just pulling into the parking lot when she stopped answering him.

He never ran faster in his life.

When he reached her she'd passed out from what was left of a near empty bottle of sleeping pills mixed with cheap bourbon. He'd been relived to find that was the only damage, though the razor sitting next to the bottles sent a chill down his spine as he called Ducky.

Ducky had been grimly pleased by his news, saying she'd called Tony earlier in the episode than before, and he'd kept her from hurting herself further. It had taken Gibbs months to reach her like that. Of course the circumstances were vastly different but it gave them both hope.

When Abby woke up in the morning she looked Tony in the eye, something she hadn't done the previous time.

He'd asked her if she wanted to talk about it she shook her head and signed something.

"Abby, you know I don't know what your saying." Tony said, putting his hands over hers. "I don't think you want me mangling it in the attempt."

She sighed, shook her head and spoke. "…maybe someday Tony. I don't want to think about oblivion anymore."

He nodded, not really understanding what she meant. But when she wrapped her arms around her stomach, almost like she was trying to hold herself together Tony understood that at least.

"Let me help" He said, sitting next to her on the autopsy table and pulling her into a tight hug, holding her until he felt her untense slightly and maybe a few of her pieces fell back into place.


	3. Week Three: Thawing

**A/n of the snake:** Never fear One in Four fans. I've actually figured out what comes next and have the story half written in my head. Very soon there will be an update.

**A/n of the Rooster:** Very clever readers might begin to be able to detect a pattern/theme for last chapter, this chapter, and the next three chapters. If I can figure out how to send a personal message anyone who correctly guesses it will receive a preview for the next chapter.

_No idioms were hurt in the making of this fic_

* * *

He didn't really understand what caused it or how it happened. Perhaps the vibrations had been building and they just had been too busy trying to go on like nothing was different to notice. Maybe they'd been trying so hard to play nice with agent Lee that they'd just come to the breaking point. Maybe they'd been leaning so hard on each other they were all about to stumble and fall.

Tony didn't understand how or why, but two weeks after Gibbs left the ice had thawed and shock burst into anger.

It was a strange occurrence. Almost overnight his team which had been getting along far better than they had in the dysfunctional days with "dad" overnight started snapping at each other and agent Lee, who quickly withdrew into her far desk and practically hid there. Tony half expected if he'd offered to move her to a offical desk she'd would of asked him not to.

He and Abby alone seemed unaffected at first, still stuck back in the numb denial of the previous week. It only took a day and a half of watching McGee and Ziva snap at each other and him, only forming alliances to snap at agent Lee before he knew he had to do something. It wasn't like them, the teasing normally was just all in good fun but this was bordering on vicious.

They needed to talk about this. A memory of the previous week flickered through his mind. "Campfire!" Tony said, banging a fist on his desk to get their attention.

The curious looks from his team at least stopped the bickering.

"Gather round my desk here everyone. You too very special agent Lee." He added to the woman who had only been encouraged to join a few of the previous weeks campfires. McGee was taking his sweet time to pull over his chairs and Ziva hadn't moved. "Ziva." He said, not realizing how close the way he said it sounded to Gibbs.

Almost instinctively it seemed Ziva started to move but in half a moment sat her chair back down and sat in it defiantly. "Why? So you can ford your power over us? Is this your attempt to wet your feet as our boss?"

This was dangerous territory. He was about to make a woman who knew five ways to kill him with a paperclip angry at him, but that had never stopped Gibbs and it was time he had to start stepping up to that plate or they'd never recover from this. "Lord power, and get your feet wet Ziva." Tony corrected her as he stood up. "And if you don't get your chair over here…"

"You'll what Tony?"

He made a instant decision. It was time he started acting his part. He walked over to Ziva and head slapped her.

The silence following was almost defining. As Ziva looked up at Tony, rage in her eyes yet also…

Abandonment?

Then it struck him why everyone was so angry. They'd also been hurt by this. Gibbs had been the teams protector and mentor and maybe even a father figure to them. They'd been abandoned too and none of them really knew how to deal with all the sudden changes and what they meant to them.

"Ziva, campfire, now." He said. His voice leaving no room for argument yet he nodded slightly, confirming something to her he was pretty sure neither of them understood.

She moved to join the campfire. Slowly he walked back, deciding what he was going to say and what he was going to say with what he didn't say.

"This has to stop." He said, looking at McGee and Ziva. "I know I'm not Gibbs. I know Gibbs left, and believe me I'm just as pissed as you two but in case you haven't noticed we're back on active duty. You two can think what you want about the situation but when we go out there in the field if you two so much as look at anyone on this team the wrong way you'll be on desk duty until next Christmas. I will not have an agent in the field who won't follow orders or has a bone to pick with another member of this team. If I can't trust you to have everyone's back you're a liability I'm not going to tolerate. Understand?"

No one said a word for a moment. For a moment no one even seemed to breath. Later he would wonder if it was his imagination or maybe wishful thinking that made him think he saw a look on their faces similar to one Gibbs had often left them with. After a minute dragged on he nodded. "Campfire over, back to work."

Jenny called to him from upstairs. He glanced back to his team, giving his patented Dinozzo smile as he said. "If anyone's missing an eye by the time I'm back your all in trouble."

"What about a few teeth?" Ziva mused out loud as he left. Her voice was light and friendly.

Tony breathed a sigh of relief. Looked like he wasn't going to be assassinated after all.

"Nice work Tony." The Director told him as they walked to her office together. "Gi-"

"Not today director." He cut her off. "My teams not the only ones a little pissed right now."  
She nodded and led him into her office.

* * *

He ran his first errand for her the following morning, not showing up at work until two hours after he normally did. As he walked into the bullpen, carrying his own coffie and a Caf-Pow for Abby he looked around expectantly. "What no pigs head on a pike?" He asked looking around, pointing to them all with a finger as if counting them. "No one's been killed I see." He commented again. "I have to say team, I'm very proud. Yesterday I was afraid if I left for lunch you'd go Battle Royal by the time I was back and now I was gone two whole hours and you havn't even started tribal warfare yet. Though I think the legal department is in need of a little competition."

He sat his stuff down at his desk and looked back to see McGee and Ziva giving him nearly identical. "huh?" Looks.

Seemed like everything was back to normal.

Suddenly he was hit from behind by something it would take him half a moment to realize was Abby hugging him fiercely. "You're here I thought you might not be coming today!" She said her exuberance over the top. "Where were you? Are you okay? I was so worried that you were sick or had gotten into a car accident or had moved to some tropical country."  
He patted her hand gently. "I was running errands for the director Abby." He choked out, finding it hard to breath. "I'm fine Abbs. Having trouble breathing."

Quickly she let him go and he turned, handing her the Caf-Pow. "Finish those DNA tests yet?" She shook her head and he snatched back the Caf-Pow a teasing smile on his lips. "How soon are you going to finish them?"

Abby pouted. "As soon as I get back to the Lab."

He handed her the Caf-Pow again. "If that's finished before the DNA tests you aren't getting another one the next time I come down."

She nodded and saluted with the right arm, her left hand still wrapped eagerly around the Caf-Pow before she turned to head down to the lab,

Tony watched her go. Glad to see she at least seemed happy. She was continuing the parade of long-sleeves, arm-warmers, and elbow length gloves she'd started more than a week ago when she came back to work after that night. She'd told him she had enough knowledge of makeup to hide the scars well enough once the cuts were healed up until then she could only do so much. Yet even with that grim reminder of what had happened he was glad to see her her usual effervescent self.

He sat back at his desk and watched the other two work a moment before Ziva spoke. "Abby has been acting quite strangely lately." She commented.

"She took it hard." Tony answered as casually as he could.

"How hard?" Ziva asked, a meaningful tone in her voice. Tony looked up to see Ziva was resting her arm on the desk and had her hand resting on it. When she saw she had his attention she slowly drew her nails across the underside of her arm, and raised a questioning eyebrow.

Was there anything Ziva didn't see?

Tony looked back to his work but quickly sent Ziva an email. "Conference room."

She nodded and went to the elevator. Once Tony was sure that McGee was engrossed in whatever he was doing he followed.

He hit the emergency stop button without even thinking. It was only when Ziva visibly flinched that he realized it might bring back painful memories. He didn't comment though. Ziva would talk about it only if she thought she needed to.

Instead he went back to the subject that had led them there. "What?"

"She hurts herself Tony." She answered bluntly, almost like she didn't think Tony knew. "I think Gibbs knew and did what he could but Gibbs is gone now and she has started again. You mean much to her Tony. She looks to you as a brother. She needs you."

He nodded, though he tried to deny that it stung that Ziva had been aware of this longer than he had. "I know, I'm doing what I can. How long have you known?"

"I suspected from almost the day I met her." She admitted. "Scars are considered a powerful means of recognition since they're nearly always unique and many take decades to completely fade. In Mussad we were taught to tell when scars are being hidden by clothing or makeup." She gave a small sigh putting a hand on Tony's arm. "Take care of her. She is our little sister to Tony." She hit the emergency stop button again. "And next time you are going to be late call. She was worried ill about you."

Tony shook his head, not even bothering to correct her.

* * *

Four days and a difficult case later had the entire team in a sour mood once more. The killer had gotten away and it looked like they weren't going to get this one. It had started simply. The entire team had taken a trip down to Abby's lab in the hopes she'd have some new leads or at least fresh insight to offer them.

She'd had neither.

They'd started debating about what to do next. Agent Lee was the only one not to throw out at least half a dozen ideas and twice that many reasons why the other's ideas were idiotic. The debate heated up. They were all low on sleep and high on tension and the need to get this guy. The debate turned into an argument and then a shouting match.

"Get out of my Lab!" Abby shouted at them. Only later would Tony note the hint of desperation in her voice.

"Shut up Abby" The words hadn't even left his mouth before he'd of gladly done something horrible to take them back.

The room went silent. Abby's music, long since drowned out by the sound of their voices seemed to be between songs.

Without warning Ziva grabbed McGee and Agent Lee's sleeves and all but dragged them from the room.

"Abby" He said.

"Go." She said before disappearing back into her office and locking the door. She sat at her computer and started signing. Tony only guessed it was to the picture of Gibbs she kept as a screen saver.

He'd check back in on her before the end of the day when they'd both had time to cool off.

Ziva cornered him at his desk the moment he sat down, accusation in her eyes. She said nothing but she didn't need to. Murder was written on her face.

"Relax Ziva, I'll talk to her once we've both cooled down." Ziva didn't move. "Do you have a problem Ziva."

"If I do? Are you going to desk me Tony?" She asked, voice cold. "Good leadership Tony. This never would of happened if-"

"Gibbs were here?" He asked standing up to face her. "Well I've got news for you Ziva. I'm not Gibbs and guess what you aren't the only one in need of adjusting. In the time since Gibbs left I've had to take over as team leader, take over as the Directors errand boy, hold this team together, keep you and MeGee from murdering each other or the probie, manage cases that aren't exactly the easiest we've ever had while trying to get me and the closest thing I've ever had to a little sister through losing a father while keeping said little sister from fucking killing herself. Is it too much to ask for you two to get your heads out of your asses, tear your eyes away from your computers and training and consider that maybe I'm not going to be able to fix this, and you, and her all by myself."

Silence was his only answer, broken by the sound of elevator doors closing.

He sat down at his desk. "Go home everyone." He said. "This case is over. If he hasn't made it to the border by now he will by the time we even start to figure out what we're going to do. Legal team can start trying to get him back tomorrow. Theres nothing more we can do tonight."

Slowly they all left without a word.

Tony sat at his desk for a long time until the building had gone quiet and the building was all but empty. He didn't know when it happened exactly, and later he wouldn't even let himself believe he'd done it.

But some point that night he laid his head in his arms and let go. It was only afterwards; when he went home to change and get an hour or two of sleep that he would try to figure out why his sleeves and face were wet.


	4. Week Four: The Crash

**A/n of the Something:** RL shit is really getting difficult but I should start posting much more frequently after Friday.

**A/n of the whatever:** This is the halfway point. The challenge from the previous chapter continues but the cycle about which I'm referring to should be much more obvious by the end of this. The new incentive is a preview of chapter seven (The chapters actually a series of seven telephone conversations between Abby and Tony, the preview is one of those conversations)

**A/n of the whobear:** Dedicated to my big sister and adorable little niece. Their visit has delayed the posting of this chapter a good deal but the joys of a three year old running around more than makes up for it in my mind.

_No Cell phones or bottles of bourbon were hurt in the making of this fic._

* * *

**Week Four: The crash**

* * *

That night was when the last of the ice melted and the world came crashing down.

The denial, the anger… it faded and they couldn't keep it at bay anymore.

Gibbs was gone, he wasn't coming back, he wasn't just out getting coffee or down with Abby or getting Ducky to get to the point in autopsy, or fighting with the director.

He was just gone.

When they all came into work the next day the silence in the bullpen was so deafening even those not normally involved in Gi- Tony's team kept their voices to a hushed whisper, unnerved by the silence coming from the usual rowdy agents.

They had no new cases that day, a blessing after the disaster their last case had been. Tony was pretty sure he wasn't the only one who would rather not have to think of such a major failure this particular day.

They avoided making eye contact, avoided speech, avoided each other. They didn't seem to have energy for any of this and drowning their sorrows in paperwork for the second time in less than a month seemed the healthiest alternative to speech.

Tony knew he should do something to pull his team together, or at least go see Abby to make sure she was doing okay but one look at the defeated faces of his team, and a glance at the three cups stacked at the back of the fridge was enough to drive him back to his desk.

He knew he HAD to see Abby before the day was over. He knew what he was dealing with well enough by now that he didn't doubt she'd do something to herself if he didn't fix this mess.

But he just couldn't make himself face her, and his own failure the day before. Not when he felt like this.

The next day brought no change. The entire team seemed just as down as before but the dark circles had deepened. They might not have laid awake half the night, trying to battle back nightmares of three A.M. calls from suicidal surrogate sisters, shouting parental units, and abandonment from fathers but he didn't doubt they'd had rough nights all the same.

Battling depression when one was already tired proved to be more than they could handle that day. When director Shepard called him in to send him on a new "errand" he made a decision as team leader. He asked her to take them off active duty for today and tomorrow and if that didn't work to throw them latterly anything she could find. Even a parking ticket would do.

Jenny nodded her understanding.

Somewhere in the back of his mind he noted her makeup was particularly heavy today.

Maybe the team wasn't the only ones hit hard.

The errand took longer than Tony had expected, but when he returned no one seemed to have noticed his absence. He announced without his usual bravado that they were off active duty for a couple of days for "this" to wear off. That they should all go home and get some rest.

Everyone complied.

The next two days passed in a strange fog of caffeine, exhaustion and an unwillingness to do anything. It was on Friday morning, as he sat at his desk and watch agent Lee come in, straightening her collar in a way he knew rather well that he'd have his first clear moment in days.

"Agent Lee"

"Yes sir?" She asked, jumping in surprise. He hadn't spoken to her in days after all. She probably had grown used to the quiet of the bullpen. She approached him cautiously.

Absently he pointed to the other side of his desk, facing him rather than standing next to him. She moved quickly stuttering apologies. "Don't apologies" Tony said, the words falling easily from his lips.

She nodded quickly opening her mouth to apologies again and falling silent.

"There are some rules here agent Lee, I guess we haven't been teaching them too well but you should be familiar with rule twelve." He paused longer than he meant to. He'd started so casually but…

"Rule twelve?" She asked, shaking him from his reverie.

"Never date a coworker Agent Lee." He gave her his patented smile, ignoring the way his cheeks hurt from the gesture he hadn't made in so long. Her blush and stuttered, half stifled apologies made him shake his head. "Back to your desk Lee. We're back on active duty today." He looked up to where McGee and Ziva were watching him from their desks. "If you two are ready to shake this thing?" He asked, softness in his voice he rarely showed.

They both still had dark circles under their eyes, Mcgee looked like he had lost weight, and Ziva's knuckles were bruised and scabbing. He'd long ago guessed punching objects that were probably better left alone would be a stress reliever she'd resort too.

But at the same time he could see them both nod ever so slightly. They were as tired as he was of feeling like this. Somewhere in the back of his mind he thanked the gods of irony that Agent Lee was the one to help wake him up. He'd needed even that little moment to remember he was wearing the leader hat now.

He had to pull them through this too.

"Then I'll go see what Jen has for us. Do any of you object to working through the weekend?" None of them answered but he took a moment to asses them. Ziva probably would be happy to drown grief in work. From what he knew of her she'd been doing it most of her life. McGee would probably like the distraction and maybe a chance to spend time with Abby. Lee looked like she was just happy they were pulling themselves back together.

Wait Abby…

Shit he needed to see her. After he saw Jen.

He'd go to see her after he got the case.

"Then I'll go tell her we want to put in for overtime. Probie, get ready to order us some Chinese for dinner tonight. We're gonna try to break the record for cases done in a weekend. That sound good to everyone?"  
They nodded and then McGee coughed, his ears turning red as he purposefully said three words that made one more piece fall into place and a little worry ease.

"Got it boss."

Ziva nodded slowly. "Yeah. 'Got it Boss'" She repeated, the words sounding awkward coming from her but the meaning made a smile.

"uh… got it boss?" Lee put in causing the other three to laugh.

Like the breaking of a spell a moment later a phone rang somewhere else in the bull pen and like birds at sunrise the chorus of usual office white noise returned.

"Campfire over" He said for effect before turning to walk up to see the director only to find her standing on the stairs waiting for him. An approving smile on her face.

"What do you have for us?" He asked.

"Work" Was her simple answer before using the opportunity to personally relay the information to his team.

He figured she was trying to reassure herself they were ready to get back to work.

He'd hate himself for it later but it wasn't until the next day when he needed her too do some labwork that he found the courage to pay a visit to Abby's lab. He was horrified to think that it had been nearly a week since they'd spoken.

When he walked through the doors to find the lab musicless and a strange lab-rat at the mass spec he took barely enough time to give the Lab-rat the evidence before heading for autopsy.

Ducky didn't wait to hear the story or to comment on their lack of communication that week. Tony guessed he'd been aware of the dark clouds haunting the team that week. He had his own dark circles to hint that it hadn't been an easy week for him either. "She called in sick today Tony." He told him the moment Tony walked in the door. "I checked on her earlier and she seemed fine but…"  
"Your worried." Tony said, not needing to express his own concern. Ducky wouldn't have gone straight to the subject of Abby if it hadn't been obvious.

"She's been acting quiet odd this week. Kept talking about how she didn't want to add to something. I've only picked up a few phrases of sign language you know." He sighed and sat down at his desk, removing the gloves he'd been wearing for autopsy. "Where has Palmer gotten off to I wonder" He muttered to himself. "I sent him to get me a new cellphone almost an hour ago. How long does it take?"

"Your's broke Duck?" Tony asked absently, trying to make sense of the situation.

"It stopped ringing. I can't tell you how many calls I've missed since Abigail was playing with it while she was hear yesterday. The noise was dreadful but I'm afraid after I complained a few times she hacked the phone and now it doesn't even ring."

"Probably just put it on silent Ducky. Let me see." Tony said picking up the offending phone from where it sat on the desk. He flipped it open. "You missed a call." He remarked as he pressed play and went to switch the silent mode off.

"You have one missed message. First missed message:" The next eight words would send their world crashing off it's axis once again.

"Ducky?" It was Abby's voice, you could barely tell her words from the sounds of sobbing. A crash of breaking glass followed. "please I… oh god… I'm so sorry…" Another louder thump. The sound of a phone falling to the floor and the message cut off.

The dead shocked silence that followed was perhaps worse than that horrible day on the roof when Kate had died.

"It's from thirty eight minutes ago" Tony said, his voice sounding distant even to him. "Cal…" He cut himself off. "I'll get your car" He said to Ducky, thinking of the almost ambulance the Duck-mobile was.

Ducky was already grabbing his stuff.

Tony paused only a moment on the way out the door, shutting the elevator off for a fraction of a second. The half hysteric part of his mind he was putting into suspension until further notice won just a brief moment.

If there was any power in that ghost of Gibbs that they all felt the strongest in this turned off elevator that small part of him, the part of the human mind that reached to faith when things were this desperate, half preyed half begged whatever power that spirit still had would help him pull Abby through this.

If Abby was still alive to pull through at all.


	5. Week Five: UsBeingTogetherness

**A/n of the giant:** Giant sized chapter here, more than 4000 words, twice my normal chapter size, but I couldn't bear to break it up into two parts so you'll just have to be twice as excited in your reviewing or something.

**A/n of the mouse:** I feel quite foolish. I was watching Shalom again and I realized Gibbs was gone for four months rather than two. At first I considered just hoping no one would notice (honestly I didn't until I watched it four times in a row) but I kinda like the idea of having more time to play around with so I think I'm going to change a few things mostly the title. When I post the next chapter "Acceptance" I'm going to be changing the name to "Some Time to Fall Apart" rather than Eight Weeks (since it's really 16 weeks). Just a heads up.

_Pauley Perrette was not hurt in the making of this fic_

* * *

**Week Five: Us-Being-Togetherness**

* * *

When Ziva and McGee arrived at the hospital and found their way to where Tony and Ducky stood waiting outside a room Ziva stopped in her tracks. She had seen many friends die and been to many hospitals but…

Something in the way Ducky stood, silent with a hand covering his face, and the way Tony was snapping at the cute nurses rather than flirting let her know that her fears when she'd gotten the call that Abby had been rushed to the hospital had been well founded.

She just hopped not for the reasons she feared.

"Ducky?" McGee asked, approaching the old doctor. His sleeves were stained with blood, a sight that made McGee flinch away.

"What happened?" Ziva asked, her own voice sounding different. "How is she?"

"She slit her wrists Ziva." Tony said, anger in his eyes and voice. "That was After she overdosed on pain medication and sleeping pills" He turned away muttering to himself. She didn't catch what he said but by the defeated slump of his shoulders and the guilt just below his anger she had a feeling he wasn't congratulating himself for a job well done.

Ziva watched as McGee literally staggered into a wall, feeling the old ice settle around her heart that formed when a normal person would be falling apart and she knew she had to hold it together. She watched as Ducky ran a hand over his face, a mannerism she distantly identified as something he might of picked up from Gibbs.

"Should we call Gibbs?" She asked. "He mig-"

"Might what?" Tony interrupted, spinning back to face them. "It's his fault." There was murder in his eyes, something that shocked Ziva. She supposed Gibbs was safer to blame than himself though. "He abandoned us! Abandoned her!"

Abandoned you, Ziva thought, recognizing that look in Tony's eyes. It was familiar to most of those present.

He met her cold eyes for a long moment and stormed off to find a doctor.

"We administered first aid and were able to keep her alive. They're doing their best to treat her but it was a close call. Last update we had she was critical but stable."

"Meaning what?" Ziva asked.

"She's not barely holding on, but she still has a good chance of dieing." A male voice said as he stepped out of her room. Tony seeing him ran back from the nurse station. "But don't worry. We've managed to stabilize her slightly more. I'd say it looks like Miss Succito is going to pull through."

They all breathed a sigh of relief. "She's resting comfortable right now, but it may be be quite some time before she wakes up. We'll have to keep her under observation in case complications arise but you may see her now."

They headed for the door but before they entered her room the doctor stopped them. "Do any of you know where we could find Leroy Jethro Gibbs? He's listed as her next of kin and I need to discus treatment with him." None of them responded, none of them knew how to respond to that. "Perhaps you know Anthony Dinozzo? His name was recently added as a second contact in case the earlier was out of touch."

"That's me doc" Tony said. "If you don't mind I'd like to see her first." He said, his voice unreadable.

"Take your time Mr. Dinozzo. Ask a nurse to track me down when you are ready."

Tony simply nodded and led the way into Abby's room.

Abby's room was quiet save for the beep of machines monitoring her vitals.

She was deathly pale, her chest barely rising and falling as she breathed. The white bandages firmly wrapped around her wrested were a painful reminder of what their favorite lab-rat was doing here.

Tony was the first to find the courage to approach the bed, reaching out with a hand that almost shook to touch her hair. She looked so fragile Ziva thought she looked like a china doll.

Like she might break at the mere touch.

He gently ran his fingers through her hair, down for once, before he moved to begin shuffling through drawers.

"Tony?" Ziva asked, wondering what he was doing until he'd pulled out a bag of her affects and found the two hair ties she used to tie up her pigtails.

She watched him fumbling with Abby's hair half a moment before Ziva stepped forward to take over. The action broke the spell over the rest of them. Ducky and McGee approached the bed slowly.

"We should get a bit of music in here." Ducky said. "They say those in a" His voice faltered at the word coma "Those sleeping as she is can hear what's going on around them. Abigail is probably quite upset there is no music."

"We could play really bad music, get her angry enough to wake up and yell at us for it?" McGee asked and sighed, his "spaniel" face on. "I swear Abby… If you pull through this I'll let you reformat all my computers." It was an odd thing to say but Ziva vaguely remembered them arguing about it a little more than a week ago.

Had it really been a week since he'd spoken to Abby? Ziva thought even as she realized how long it had been since SHE had spoken to Abby, how long since anyone here but Ducky had spoken to Abby. They'd pulled through because of Tony and each other. Abby had…

Been left alone in her lab surrounded by reminders of what they all were missing.

"I shall teach you how to shoot a gun, if you still wish Abby" Ziva offered. "You will be a better shot than Tony before long."

"I will take you to the next Android Lust concert Abigail" Ducky said sadly as Ziva finished the second Pigtail. "Just come back to us my dear."

Tony leaned over to whisper in Abby's ear. "I'll drag him back here in irons if I have to. All you have to do is wake up and ask me to."

He sighed, kissed her on the cheek and left to talk to the doctor.

Tony found the doctor reviewing a file by the nurse's station. "Dr.?"

"Dr. Grey" He supplied. "Why don't we come over here to discuss treatment. Are you and Mrs. Succito related?"

How do you even begin to explain? "Foster siblings" He simply stated, figuring it was close enough to count.

Dr. Grey nodded, apparently not surprised by the news. "I suppose you are aware then this is not her first attempt at suicide. Although there's only been one other incident in the past few years." He read out a date and Tony nodded, not surprised. Looking back on that absence between Kate and Ari's death and Ziva's addition to the team he wasn't surprised to find she'd been hospitalized and Gibbs had smoothed it over. As he was also not surprised by the sharp decrease in her suicidal behavior in "recent" years. Gibbs had known her for those "recent" years.

"After we clear her to leave here I had thought to suggest you have her placed in a recovery home for some time to insure her safety but reviewing her file I find that may not be necessary, not to mention such places may be even more detrimental to her mental health."  
Tony defiantly had a feeling being locked up anywhere would drive Abby crazy. As if he'd ever consider sending her to a loony bin anyway. "I'll sign her out and take care of her until I'm sure she's stable. I've known her long enough to know the difference."

The doctor nodded slightly but didn't look convinced. "Suicide watch is a twenty-four hour watch sir. Her files show she can be determined. Perhaps we should wait until she may be released into the care of Mr. Gibbs. He's the one who signed her out the last time and seemed to do wonders for your sister."

"He's not coming back" Tony said bitterness in his voice. "It's his fault she's here." He didn't know why he suddenly was so frank with a doctor he didn't know. Maybe he just needed to talk to someone not on the team. "He was like a father to her. He's the reason she's done so well these past years. She looked to him as a father and he left us."

"…us?" Doctor Grey asked softly, a thoughtful look on his face. "Might he be the foster father?"

Tony swallowed hard. "And what if he is? He was more a father to my team than any of us had before." He sneered slightly. "Though the walking out was VERY fatherly behavior from what we're used to." He was ranting, he knew it, but it was a good way to stay together. "He…" Just as suddenly his anger faded and he sighed. "It's hard without him. My team looks to me to make this right but I'm not sure how except to keep us together. But we're a family, my team is, and in the absence of a father the eldest will take over. I'm senior field agent so that means me." He looked toward the room. "I'll see her safe for the few days after she leaves the hospital and see where that brings us. Does that satisfy you doctor?"

He nodded slowly. "very well. I'll leave you to it for now Mr. Dinozzo." He patted Tony's arm with a slowly more approving smile. "Good Luck" He stood and walked away to continue his work.

Tony let himself rest for only half a moment, briefly wondering how often Gibbs had been tempted to just hit the emergency stop button to take a break from responsibilities. He briefly fancied he was developing the urge to build a boat in his basement when he remembered he was mad at Gibbs.

And that he had work to do.

Tony walked back toward the hallway where the others were waiting, having been kicked out by a nurse he guessed. He paused just around the corner to listen.

"Why would she do this?" It was McGee who asked the question playing on all of their minds.

"I've yet to find two doctors able to agree on Abby's diagnosis" Ducky said, falling back on his medical training to avoid the emotional hit. "A situation very similar to manic depression, exasperated by post traumatic stress, a unusual childhood, and misdiagnosis and treatment by doctors have I'm afraid left our dear Abigail vulnerable more than most. She calls it "Oblivion" like a physical entity inside her mind though it's difficult to get her to speak of it at all. She does her best when she has someone who can keep her grounded in reality when Oblvion presses too hard. Agent Gibbs served as that for years…" His voice faded and Tony decided to make his return known.

"And now I guess I'm stepping up to the plate." Tony said as he walked over to them. "I've taken up the rest of the slack he left behind." He looked between each of them, his face grim but determined. "You all ready to do this?"

He didn't specify what "this" was but they all nodded.

"Ducky" He said, turning to the doctor standing on the far right of the three in front of him.

"Yes?"

"Go home, you're mother's nurse is leaving soon isn't she? We'll keep you posted hour by hour and the moment she wakes up we'll let you know." Ducky nodded slowly. "And have Palmer bring some music by when he gets off work." Ducky nodded again.

"Ziva, McGee, I know you two don't have any pressing reason to go home but if you're staying here you two are catching as many Z's as you can, that's an order. It's late, we've been pulling all nighters after a week of all nighters. I'm taking Abby to my place after she's released to keep an eye on her which means I need you two as functional as possible in case situation means I'm not." He reached for something else to say running out of steam as he went.

It's strange how things hit you for weird reasons at weird times but at that moment the nurse emerged from Abby's room giving him a brief glance of their unconscious lab rat and he lost his voice entirely. He coughed, trying to clear his throat and his suddenly burning eyes and that shaky feeling like all the pieces were falling apart again. "Someone should call the director."

Ziva was gone from his sight suddenly and he felt a hand on his shoulder. "Tony."

He found he couldn't even muster up a "you did it again" complaint. Exhaustion was hitting him hard. "you were right." His silence spurred her on to clarify. "You can't do this all on your own. Let us help. Get some sleep, take a chair in and do so next to Abby if it helps. You need rest as much as the rest of us."

"She's right Tony" McGee said. "Go sit with Abby. We'll take care of things tonight."

Tony found himself doing as told.

He wasn't sure how long he sat watching Abby sleep, but it was sometime after he'd gotten over the stalkerish feel of it and settled down to watch over his sister as he had that first night all those weeks ago that he finally drifted off to sleep.

He dreamed he was on a beach watching a silver haired man repairing a window of some shore side bungalow as the sun rose blood red behind him. "Never bodes well" the man mumbled.

Funny he never imagined Gibbs as being superstitious.

Tony walked forward as if in, well he supposed he was in a dream, and called out to Gibbs.

Gibbs shrugged. Suddenly they were in his basement and Tony was watching him sand his boat. "You need to come back"

"I do?" He asked, his normal intuitive approach ready to go even in Tony's subconscious.

"Abby needs you" Tony said.

"Remember how I said "you'll Do"?"

"The team needs you" That didn't even get a response. Tony let out a slow breath. "I need you Gibbs."

Gibbs gave him a rare smile and walked over to him, administering a gentle but firm headslap. "Your doing fine Dinozzo. When you really need me, I'll be back"

"Like the terminator?" Tony asked, unable to resist testing his imagination's version of Gibbs.

Yeah, his subconscious had Gibb's glare down perfectly, but then Gibbs relented and smiled again, shaking his head. "Just keep doing what your doing Dinozzo." He turned away, flipping on the old TV before going back to his boat.

Tony watched the TV for awhile before suddenly the screen went white. Abby wandered across it in a hospital gown looking lost. A redheaded woman and what was likely her daughter came onto the screen and started leading Abby away.

Redheaded woman and her daughter… "Abby! Gibbs!" He said surprise and horror in his voice but when Gibbs came over to see what had upset Tony he just shook his head and smiled sadly. "Wake up Tony" He said softly poking him on the forehead. "Wake up"

"Wake up Tony" A finger prodded his forehead gently as he opened his eyes. He saw a long pale finger raised an inch off the bed he'd fallen asleep leaning against about to poke him once more.

His head shot up when he recognized the voice.

"Abby!" He said, jubilant, when he saw she was awake and smiling weakly at him.

She nodded, returning his smile with one of her own, though it took a moment for him to realize it didn't reach her eyes.

After all, she'd tried to kill herself, waking up alive in a hospital was probably not what she'd had in mind.

He sighed and sat back, his smile fading slightly. "Why Abbs?" He asked.

She looked down, weakly moving her arms so she could begin to sign as an answer. Tony lifted her chin to look at him and signed something he'd made sure to learn after finding out she had a habit of signing when she didn't want to talk. _'Talk don't sign, that's an order'_

"If only to stop you from mangling it more." She said, her voice rough and weak. She looked down again. "I'm… I'm sorry Tony." She said simply.

"Don't apologies Abby remember? It's a sign of weakness. Your too strong for that."

"Am not" She said softly. "Or you wouldn't have to "keep your sister from fucking killing herself." You don't have sisters Tony, just me"

Tony felt like someone had just punched him in the gutt, he hadn't meant that. He certainly didn't want her to think he felt that way. "Abby…"

"I'm no use am I? I mean he took me in because I was good and I mean if I can do work than I'm worth keeping around but I just can't function anymore and you've got too much other stuff going on and I should just let you do your thing. You might be able to find another good labrat and it would just be easier for everyone if I just" She tried to continue her ramble but her voice was shaky as she finally got to what was really bothering her. "Maybe if I hadn't been here he wouldn't of felt like it was too much to stay. I take so much out of everyone, maybe it's my fau-"

"Don't even start." Tony interrupted her. "Don't. You're our Abbs, our little sister, and we care. I was just upset Abbs, but not at you. I could never be mad at you."

"Promise?" She asked, looking fragile.

"Promise" he swore, stroking one of her pigtails. "Though I'll be very distressed if we end up back here."

"Well I wouldn't want to get you distressed. You get all hot and bothered and it's a little gross really." She said with a weak but teasing smile. Her smile faded a little. "Does everyone know?"

"The secrets out but if you promise to listen to me I'll do my best to keep them off your case."

"I'll try." She said with a small sigh, though he could tell she wasn't completely convinced.

They still had work to do.

It was two days before Abby was released from the hospital. For that time Ducky, Ziva, or Mcgee stayed with her. Occasionally others came to visit, friends and the other members of the team coming to talk to her and see if she really was doing better. Tony was in and out constantly but the others insisted that he not take any of the night shifts of "Abby Sitting". He needed to get as much sleep as he could now to better watch over her once she was released from the hospital.

They discussed what would happen if she needed watching for more than a few days but never finalized plans. Her files showed she normally bounced back surprisingly fast and they could see for themselves the change in those few days. It seemed as if she'd finally hit bottom and after a brief rest had started climbing back out. Everyday hour it seemed she grew stronger, laughed a little more, talked a little faster, and listened to a little louder music. There were moments when Unabby returned and a few times when she lost her grip and started to fall apart again but they were always there and whenever she began to fall they caught her.

Tony took her home the third day after what he'd come to think of as the crash. She was already doing much better than he'd imagined she would do in a week and he breathed a small inner sigh of relief. It looked like she'd survive this.

She was still too weak to go into work, not to mention she was on "sick leave" until she passed a phyc evaluation to meet Jenny's satisfaction (and to help smooth things over, a employee attempting suicide created a bit of a political stir as well as massive amounts of paperwork).

In the morning Tony would drop her off at Ducky's house, where his mother's nurse had agreed she could easily keep an eye on Abby as well as Victoria. They all considered it to be likely an unnecessary precaution but they were taking no chances with Abby anymore.

In truth none of the three women seemed to mind. Victoria had always liked Abby and, although she couldn't always remember who Abby was or why she was in their house, Victoria always remembered a fondness for her in a almost grandmotherly fashion. Victoria's nurse appreciated having a willing second set of hands to help, though she was careful not to let Abby overstress herself, and a slightly more sane person to talk to. Abby found them both interesting and in a strange way comforting.

After work Tony would pick Abby up and they'd get something to eat and go home. The hardest part of the day for both of them was changing the bandages on the still healing slashes on her wrists, but at the same time it was strangely meaningful. The daily reminder of what had happened hurt but after the first time Tony used the time for them to talk about what happened and why, for everything that had happened since Gibbs left. The first night it was mainly him talking about his struggles to take over Gibb's shoes and take over his role but as the third and fourth night passed she began talking as well, about her fears, her nightmares, how much she missed Gibbs. Later she would tell him how ironic it was. Of all the scars she carried those two scars were the ones she hoped would never fade. She didn't want to keep them for the memory of the pain that had caused them but those conversations that started while taking care of them that had eventually drawn long into the nights.

The first night Abby had stayed with him had been long. He'd taken basic steps to prevent her from trying anything and turned on his security system to alert him if she tried to leave but he knew she was more than capable of easily passing both precautions if she wanted to. He didn't think she would but he didn't sleep that night just in case. The second night after she took the sleeping pills the doctors had cleared her for (as Tony carefully watched) and settled down to sleep he let himself doze off for a few hours.

The third night the conversation started while he rebandaged her wrists stretched long into the night and at the end of it he told her he was going to sleep and to wake him if she needed anything. He didn't say he was trusting her, but he knew she got the message.

When he woke that morning it wasn't to the sounds of his alarm but her shaking him like an overexcited kid. His alarm went off just as he opened his eyes to see her picking up a tray with…black pancakes and red eggs? "Breakfast in bed or attempt to poison me?" He asked.

"Fun with food coloring!" She said with a pleased smile on her face.

"…nice Abby. Reminds me of this movie…"

Five weeks to the day after Gibbs left, only four days after she left the hospital Abby went in to take her phyc evaluation to see if she could return to her lab and the job she loved.

The team waited outside in the hall for the doctors verdict. They didn't speak but they understood what that shared feeling was. If they could really get Abby through this. If she passed her evaluation, if this turned out okay and things would be okay again.

Then their world might start to turn again. Then they would have passed this test to. Life would truly continue and things would be like before, only minus Gibbs.

When Abby emerged, her face disheartened they breathed a collective sigh of dismay at her failure to pass but at the same time renewed their resolve. They wouldn't give up. They'd keep trying until they could do this. Until Abby was better.

That resolve in the face of failure made her sudden grin, her shout of "fooled you", and triumphant fist pump all the more sweeter.

That night they celebrated Abby's recovery, family, the passing of tests, and what they agreed could simply be called the "us-being-togetherness"


	6. Acceptance

**Don't A/n, it's a sign of weakness:** Yeah… it's been awhile. Well lets see, my computer died, my neice came to visit, I started taking a summer Calc course, hell broke loose, and I got my hands on season three of NCIS that I could watch anytime.

**Never leave A/ns together**: This marks a bit of a turning point. It covers the two months and one week between the last chapter and when Tony leaves for the conference rather than a single week. After this there's just two more chapters and the Epilogue (or maybe one more if I get going and don't stop like I did on that last chapter).

**Don't mess with a Marine's A/n if you want to live: **I actually have only rough ideas as to the dates these things take place (Iced was somewhat close to the end of season three and it was late winter so I figure this proably takes place in spring but who knows) if I missed some obvious thing please excuse the mistake.

_No tires were harmed in the making of this fic._

* * *

**Acceptance**

* * *

The morning that Abby returned to work started off well. Tony woke himself up early, making them breakfast (though he avoided the food coloring) and managing not to wake her up while he was at it. She emerged, decked out to her normal scene-setting with one exception.

Her arms were bare except for the bandages carefully wrapped around her wrists.

He tried not to stare at the bandages or the scars she'd left uncovered, though in all honesty he'd never seen them quite this plainly before and morbid curiosity warred won over.

She caught him staring and shrugged, not explaining but in a way not having to. She'd made it very clear to him over the past week that despite everything she wasn't ashamed of what she'd done to herself. Being ashamed of your own pain was one of the worst types of hypocrisy, she'd told him.

He had a feeling she might of gotten that from Gibbs. Seemed like a sentiment he might endorse.

He guessed now that everyone knew what she did she wanted to prove to them and herself that she wasn't ashamed of it.

After he had a moment to process he dug into his memory bank until her could toss out a movie reference. The conversation turned light, they were laughing so hard he spilt his coffie and had to change shirts by the end of breakfast.

That little event itself had just added to Abby's mirth.

They'd stopped on the way in to get Caf-Pow! and coffie. Abby had insisted on going in with him to pick out her morning sprinkles. Caffine and donuts in hand they had come back to the parking lot to find one of his tires had gone flat. "Proably just an air leak" Abby had said as she examined his wheel.

Tony tried not to wince as the other guys in the parking lot looked at him weird as he let Abby check out his car. He resisted the urge to explain she was a forensic scientist and knew more about how cars worked then all of them combined.

Or that she'd proably hit him if he tried to stop her. She was in a feisty mood this morning. "I'll call triple A sis" he told her, trying to save his pride a bit by playing the part of the indulgent older brother. As much as it would boost his ego to be dating someone as hot as Abby letting your girlfriend control your car would not have been helpful. "You should call someone to see if they can give you a ride in."

Abby raised her eyebrows at him before realizing what he was doing.

Well, looks like trying to keep her from hitting him had been a failed cause.

She went to call Ducky on her cell as Tony called AAA. The automatic answering machine he got was not promising.

Not for the first time in his life he grumbled about the difficulty getting hold of a real person.

Before he'd even navigated his way through the option trees to a real person and was trying to figure out how far it was to the nearest gas station Ducky's Morgan pulled into the parking lot and he emerged with a grin.

"Your in luck Abigail" The doctor said as he shut off his phone and Abby rejoined Tony. "I was just driving by. I would help you with your car troubles Tony but I'm afraid I'm a bit ill equipped for such a operation. I would be happy to ensure Abigail here wasn't late for her first day back however."

"Thanks Duck." Tony said with a nod, a odd rumbling in his stomach, though he couldn't tell if it was his forming gutt or just a bad batch of eggs.

It was over an hour before he was back on the road to work, the traffic had become terrible and it took another half an hour to get into the office. He hadn't even gotten on the elevator before the director called sending him on a errand ASAP. He had permission to quickly check in on Abby to see how she was doing but if he did he better not even stop at the bull pen. She'd let the team know he was going to be a little bit later.

Abby was as happy as he'd ever seen her when he reached the lab, practically bouncing off the walls as she all but skipped around the room talking to her babies as she worked. Tony didn't even bother saying hello, asap meant asap afterall and if Abby got started rambling there was no telling how long he'd be here. He just watched her a minute or two before turning to go, content that his lab-rat was settling back in nicely.

Though his gutt was still ill at ease. The specific orders were suspicious, and the coincidence of Ducky's nearness earlier was well…

Tony didn't believe in coincidences.

Two hours later Tony found himself passing through security feeling exhausted. He'd ended up chasing the suspect Jen had sent him to talk to for nearly a mile. He'd barely been able to hold his gun steady enough and breath well enough to question the suspect at the end of it.

He had the guys sprained ankle and busted knee from the fall that had finally stopped his flight to thank for him not having to worry about the guy running away again.

But all was over and done with and a change of clothes later he was in the elevator.

With a sigh he hit the off switch for the elevator, taking a minute in the cool darkness to just let the stress of the mission and the last few days… weeks… roll off him.

His sister was back, his team was recovering, and all was well in the world.

Hell, his car was already good as new.

With his normal grin he flicked the switch back on and waited for the elevator to take him to the bullpen.

His grin turned to confusion and then to annoyance when he saw McGee sitting at his desk as if there was nothing unusual. What was the McGeek doing with his stuff?

"McProbie!" Tony snapped, causin Mcgee's head to raise to look at him.

"Yeah boss?" He asked, confusion written across his face.

"What are you doing?" Tony asked coming to stand in front of McGee.

"Writing up a report from last weeks case?" Mcgee said, confusion warring with something else.

Amusement?

"Why are you doing it at my desk?" Tony asked, annoyance raising a level.

"But this is my desk boss." McGee said, as if it had always been his desk. "All my stuffs here."

Tony head slapped him, "your desk is over there McGeek."

"But this is my desk sir" Agent Lee spoke up. Tony turned to see that she'd set up at Mcgee's desk.

But that wasn't what caught his attention. In the corner of his eye he'd caught a glimpse of Gibb's desk. Someone had touched it, someone had moved something. He turned, truly ready to berate the idiot who done it only to realize what he'd seen out of the corner of his eye was the bright red coffee cup he'd left on his desk on Friday.

He fell silent, walking over to the desk in a sort of half daze as he found himself sitting down in Gibbs', no his, chair. Here was his pile of files, here the CDs Abby had burned him. There was his mighty mouse stapler Ducky had commented on a few weeks before. His pens, his extra shirt, the mug toothbrush and razor he used when he didn't get to go home. Everything had been neatly organized in the best imitation of the way it had been at his old desk.

"Someone let the air out of my tire." Tony said absently as he tried to process what his team had done, for once at a loss for words.

"We thought that Abby would be the best one to pack up Gibbs' things and move yours." Ziva said as she came over. "McGee and I did not swoop into your belongings, and we did not feel comfortable moving Gibbs' things"

"Snoop Ziva." Tony said, unlocking his drawer and finding the manila folder with his playboy magazines. A post it note on the front teased him for his magazine choice in Abby's handwriting.

"Special Agent Dinozzo." Director Shepard called from the catwalk. "MTAC, now."

Tony locked the envelope back in the drawer and stood, glancing around the team nodding his gratitude. "back to work team."

* * *

It was odd, how time seemed to resume to it's normal speed and life truly continued as always after that day. Cases came and went, arguments, odd nick names, banter, late nights, and alcohol passed. They started spending more time together outside of work. Movie fests, trips to the bar after successful cases, going clubbing as a group with Abby (even convincing those less than club oriented to come along for the ride. Ziva started inviting him over to her place about once a week for a home cooked meal and to talk. They laughed, argued, teased each other mercilessly but adamantly resisted the wine increasing the urge to do more than flirt.

Later that friendship would help him with another relationship. After all, he learned there was a lot more ways to have a good time without the sex.

He and Abby stayed close in touch, spending time together in the lab when he could and often talking on the phone at night.

Her suicide attempt wasn't the ending of her problems. A week after she returned to work he found a repeat of the second time she called him late at night.

Three days later she was in Gibbs' basement. She'd been out clubbing and had taken a cab there because she'd been a little more drunk than normal and he'd always insisted that she come to his place if she got so drunk she started vomiting so he could make sure she didn't die from alcohol poisoning. She'd gotten all the way into his basement before realizing that he wasn't there anymore and had taken a drink of his brandy to drive off oblivion and now she didn't think she could make it back up the stairs.

He'd spent most of that night alternately trying to get her to drink water, holding her head up while she puked her guts out, cleaning up said puke, and wondering why he didn't mind doing any of it as much as he should.

That morning he'd figured the whole puke thing gave him rights to be a little intrusive. He found the card Abby had told him Gibbs had given her years ago in her purse. It had Gibbs' address on it, along with "Special Agent Gibbs" and a nicely worded warning to the reader if harm should befall Abby. It had been incase she ever got too drunk to remember his address.

Tony spent some of the time Abby was sleeping off her hangover to alter the card for his name and address, knowing exactly what Gibbs had been thinking. He probably couldn't stop Abby from being self destructive on occasion, but he'd do what he could to make sure she failed the attempts.

If Abby ever noticed she never said anything, but a week later she didn't seem surprised when she woke up on his couch instead on in Gibbs' basement.

Tony could barely belive when it reached the end of the second month Post Gibbs. Everything had become so… normal…

Even a splattering on Oblivion Incidences (as he'd come to think of the occasions where UnAbby took over) hadn't really made much drama. Abby was as bouncy as ever, even if she was a little clingy at times. Mcgee was growing into his new role, Ziva was mellowing out and Agent Lee was… well Agent Lee. They were beginning to get used to her and she was getting used to them.

Campfires had become his new pet idea and despite the teams hatred for them they put up with them.

Afterall, they all remembered how they had begun. The memories were bittersweet but important.

Though Tony's Dictaphone he picked up after watching "Memento" during one of the teams moviefest would become the object of hatred.

Even Agent Lee grumbled about it.

Nine weeks after Gibbs left they celebrated the third annual "Probie Day", otherwise known as McGees birthday. Marti-Gra came the next week and Abby's lab was the center of the celebration at NCIS, though she made a point to decorate any part of the building the director allowed her too.

From the first day to the last you could always tell who and how many times someone had been to her lab. She gave a string of beads to every visitor every time and insisted they wear them constantly.

On the last night of Marti-Gra Tony got another call. Despite her attempts to push it away all week the memories of the devastation hurricane Katrina had wrought on her home city had finally caught up with her.

They'd ended up spending all night talking about their childhoods.

After Marti-Gra came a string of hard cases followed by one of "the most boring periods of NCIS history" that had left McGee searching for a stolen car they could investigate and Tony wondering if there was some Baltimore criminal he could have Ziva assassinate and frame a sailor for just to give them something to do.

Month number three came to an end the same night another call at four in the morning had him sitting up with Abby. The lack of things to do had ended up with her going through old evidence out of boredom and she'd stumbled across Michael's old foraged suicide note.

Apparently Gibbs had never told her about that.

Later that week yet another incident brought him to her lab late at night.

She'd found out about his upcoming trip to the security conference.

It was only after he promised to call her every night and that he'd call in (rather ridiculously exaggerated) favors to get her anything she could possibly need while he was gone that she reluctantly agreed to not take off the two weeks and go with him.

Later he would wonder at that fear she'd seen in her eyes. Fear and trust. She trusted him the same as she had trusted Gibbs.

And she feared what she'd do without him all the same.  
She'd fallen asleep watching him play Tetris and woken to find a Caf-Pow! and a international cell that would let her talk to him in the UK without running up a thousand dollar phone bill.

It took him the better part of two weeks to reassure himself that the team would manage fine under McGees management for two weeks. He'd pulled them back together once and didn't want to have to do it again.

Somehow he found himself at airport security as Abby gave him a final hug, looking every bit his little sis. Once she let him go he took off his NCIS hat and put it on her head as best he could with her pigtails. "Here's looking at you kid." He said with a grin before turning to leave.

They'd be alright.


	7. From Sweden With Love

**A/n from beyond:** Well we're nearing the end. This is the last chapter with only the epilogue left. Although I am also planning a One Shot called "When You Come Back to Me" Which will be Abby's point of view on Tony and Gibbs' returns in Shalom.

**May the A/n be with you:** I'd like to thank everyone who reviewed or read or alerted or in any other way showed support for this fic. You never failed to make my day and keep me writing no matter the block I faced. This little universe is well on it's way to developing into a mini series about this world (with Of Oblivion, Phylum Cnidalia, and others I've got in my head so I hope you'll keep with me)

**Special Agent A/n:** I make a very obscure reference to another TV show Mark Harmon was in (though only for a few glorious episodes). Although the line mentioned isn't Mark Harmon's anyone who watched the show should remember it. Bonus points to any who can name the show and the character who says it.

**Some time to Fall A/n:** A couple of the details in here may be a little off (aka, I'm only mildly sure it was Sweeden and the Larson thing may have been in the fourth season) but due to you tube being an idiot and not owning the seasons I've been unable to check. Sorry

**Spoiler alert:** At some point in here the plot of Of Oblivion is outlined (Abby relates part of the story). So if you're reading Of Oblivion and don't want the plot spoiled when Admiral Churchill is mentioned skip to the next section. Later a more obscure reference is made but I'll do my best to not spoil it for you.

_No telephones, Tvs, or actors were harmed in the making of this fic_

* * *

**Chapter Seven: From Sweden With Love**

* * *

**2259 hours of Day 1**

Tony had only just put down his bags by the door of his hotel room when the phone started to ring. He picked it up, a smile already on his face. He knew who it was, who it had probably been for the past half hour or more if he knew anything.

Still, no reason not to have a little fun.

"Who vis it?" He said, faking a bad Swedish accent.

"Tony?" Abby asked, though something about her tone had Tony guessing she wasn't fooled.

"Who is this Tony you speak ov? There vis no Tony"

"I know it's you. Don't try fooling around."

"Alright Abbs, you caught me." He finally relented, returning to his normal voice. "What's to report?" He asked, finding a comfy chair by the window of his room and pulling out some files to review. "How'd bowling with sister what's her name go?"

"Oh! She avoided the gutters! She managed to do it!"

"So the time spent teaching her was… time well spent?" He asked, still unable to get over the idea of Abby teaching a nun how to bowl.

They talked for a while of this and that, like they had been a few times a week since Abby had returned to work. As time dragged on though, Tony's responses became increasingly monosyllabic and the words on the page in front of him became to blurry to read and started swimming laps inside his head. He Didn't want to hang up first though. Not until he was sure. He was an ocean away but he wanted to make sure she'd be okay when he hung up.

"Omigod" Abby more shrieked than said, causing Tony to jump up, banging his knees against the table closer to him than he remembered and sending his papers flying all over as he reached for the side arm he wasn't carrying.

"What? Abby!" He said, the fact he didn't have his gun and was a thousand miles away anyway taking a longer to sink through his exhaustion hazed mind than instincts.

"It's nearly three o'clock in the morning where you are. You need sleep! Go! Now!"

The loud click of the phone shutting only made him smile before he collapsed onto bed. A second later the phone was ringing again.

"Abby?" He asked, worried that this was exactly what he was afraid of.

"Don't even think about going to bed without brushing your teeth."

**2130 hours 2nd day**

"Special Agent Tony Dinozo. Leave a message"

"Your on the hotel phone! You can-"

"Fool you?" Tony interrupted with a laugh. "Yeah, figured I might try again. How are things in the ol' country"

"Boring! There are no cases, not even with the other teams. It's like May all over again. So not going through the cold case files again but all I did today was help Agent Larson with a pregnancy test!" There was a pause. "Before you ask she's not."

"Well that's good." Tony said, pretending to breath a sigh of relief. "I'm not sure I could handle McBabbies running around the bullpen, reformatting hard drives or whatever he does."

"You do realize Mary's getting married, avoiding a pun about Marrying a Mary by the way, to Pattrick Trueman from her team next month. The McGee things kinda over."

"Since when did you turn into such a gossip?"

"I'm a scientist Tony. I have to know these things. Besides, she invited me to the reception."

Tony had once found the idea of Abby at a wedding only slightly less amusing than the idea of her teaching a nun to bowl but he knew better now. With such a big heart Abby had a tendency to make everyone who knew her feel like her closest friend, and so much love given freely tended to be welcome at a wedding. He'd heard of at least four she'd gone to in the time he'd known her. "I'll have to send flowers, maybe get myself invited to the bachelor party."

"I'm pretty sure you already are." Abby answered, a weird uncertainty in her voice. "kinda have to be the way it's being done."

"Whats that?" There was a pause and Tony braced himself for the Abby babble sure to follow.

"Well you know how Mary and I got kinda close when she had just broken up with McGee and we were doing that sharing out misery thing cause I was finally over Mikeal and she was just out of a relationship and we were doing that women scorned become happily single thing. Anyway so she needed some help for reasons I won't explain to you and invited me to the reception and I told her I would go. But I just started seeing this guy and we're so not to the wedding date stage yet and it would probably make him bail which would be just sad but I really don't like going alone. It's awkward and weird and there are pitying bridesmaids and mothers looking to find brides for their sons and that is even more awkward and guys hitting on me which is kinda cool but awkward at a wedding and I need a good synonym for awkward cause I used that ways too many times in that sentan-"

"Abby!" Tony interrupted, trying to keep her from rambling further off topic.

"-oh yeah! So I told Larson I was bringing you as my date in a sort of brotherly non incestuous capacity."

"Not that I'm not flattered but isn't there someone you'd rather take to this kinda thing? You've been to what, five weddings in the past five years? Havn't you ever gone al-" His voice trailed off as it hit him. Of course not, she'd probably always brought Gibbs along. Hell, Tony could recall one of the photo's in her apartment where she'd been in that dress she always wore to weddings, sitting with a tuxedoed Gibbs. He'd joked at the time, asking her if she was secretly Gibb's last ex wife or if she'd been the flower girl at his wedding. "oh" He simply said, letting the explanation go unsaid. "Well I'll roll out my tux, though there might be a problem since the to be wed has threatened to file a restraining order."

Abby giggled, though it was just a little bit forced. "Don't worry, Mary said she wouldn't file a restraining order on you if you talked to her at the wedding as long as you didn't hit on her in front of her husband."

"So if her husband's not around?"

"Tony!"

They talked and joked a while longer, making exaggerated plans for the wedding and pranks to be pulled on the newlyweds. When Tony decided it was time to hang up he sighed, letting the conversation end for a moment before speaking. "You keeping at it okay?"

There was a pause before Abby nodded, Tony could hear the jingling of her jewelry before she vocalized her answer. "Aye aye captain."

"Good work Abbs" Tony said, risking using Gibbs' old phrase.

She took a breath, let it out, and nodded again. "Back to word sir." She joked. "See you- well talk to you tomorrow."

"Night Abbs"

**2117 hours 3rd day**

Tony was ready for Abby's third call. Ducked beside the night stand with a war movie paused at just the right point in the background he was oh so ready.

He let the phone line ring twice, forcing his breathing to speed up as he clicked play on the movie before finally picking up the phone under a hail of shots.

"Tony?"

"Can't talk now, taking fire!"

"That's a movie Tony!" Abby insisted. "I can tell the difference."

"Come on Abby!" Tony said, almost whining. "you could at least play along a little. I spent all day planning that."

"boring day at the conference?" She asked, sounding mildly amused.

"Highschool lit class with monotoned Mr. Whitman boring. You?"

"Not much better here." She admitted. "I did a little work for a car jacking and then a case where someone was stealing bottles of soap."

"They had you investigating missing bottles of soap?"

"Well it was the team doing the investigating."

"Wait, my team?" He asked. "NCIS major case was investigating missing soap."

"Slow day at the office, though they were mostly concerned with what the soaps gonna be used for. They though someone might try to make a bomb."

"You can make bombs out of soap?"

"You can make bombs outta nearly anything if you know how. When I was in grad school my roommate and I made one out of flour, lego bricks, and superglue."

Tony wasn't even sure how to begin to respond to that. "Why?"

"Someone said that we couldn't do it."

"How'd we get here?"

"Bombs made out of soap." She said letting out a little wee. If the low squeak was any sign she was spinning on her lab chair.

"Well at least it wouldn't be a dirty bomb."

"Tony!"

**2128 hours 4th day**

"Tony?" Abby asked, sounding a little uncertain. He'd let the phone ring nearly half a dozen times before picking it up. With a chick flick movie on tv and a appropriate part coming up he'd had a new idea.

"hey Abbs" Tony said trying to sound awkward. "Um… not really a good time" The giggling from the Tv soon ruined the effect when a commercial came on.

"Still not working Tony. Even you'd have a hard time hooking up in a security conference."

"You'd be surprised how many of them I already know." Tony said, pausing a moment to reflect on a certain nice looking lady who been in attendance before moving on. "speaking of people I know I ran into someone who knows you. An Admiral no less, Admiral Churchill said you knew his daughter, no relation to the Churchi-" He cut himself off at the sound of the phone hitting the floor. "Abby!"

"Sorry" She said once she'd picked it back up. "Badly balanced while reaching for something isn't the best position to be in when you get a blast from the past."

"so you know him?"

"Yeah" She said with a sigh that confused Tony. She sounded almost depressed. "His daughter was my room mate for the first semester of grad school. She's the reason I met Gibbs."

Tony's interest perked, in all the time he'd known them he'd never been told how she met Gibbs. It was something they were weirdly secretive about. He'd heard they met on some case when Abby was still in Grad school…

Tony winced at the realization. An admiral's daughter, a roommate for only one semester, a NCIS investigation by the major case unit. The fact everyone spoke of this girl in past tense didn't bode at all well.

Abby sighed again an continued. "Darcy, my room mate, went missing. Remember the University Stalker? "

Tony felt his stomach drop. "The one who stalked Grad students at the uni… wait didn't you go there?"

"Yeah. Darcy disappeared and they called in NCIS. My name came up and one thing led to another and I was brought in for questioning. The first five minutes I knew him Gibbs thought I was a serial killer."

Tony had been prepared to hear some sad news about her friend but at this he nearly choked on the coffee he'd been drinking. "What?"

"Darcy was missing, I was the last to see her, I didn't have an alibi. The profiler talked to the phyciatrist the university had me seeing and said I was a killer waiting to happen. Even Ducky thought I was a good suspect."

"Well, things have… changed."

"Darcy was found dead while I was in interrogation with Gibbs. The ToD showed she was alive only an hour or so before. I had been in custody before then." Abby explained, her tone disturbingly matter of fact though there was a shaky edge to it "I was cleared, but I lost it when Gibbs told me. It went from interrogating a suspect to trying to reach a girl he was pretty sure would walk out those doors and commit suicide the first chance she got. He kept me in that interrogation room two hours after I'd been cleared just trying to get through to me."

She paused, a wry note mixed in with the other emotions when she continued. "In the end I guess it was a good thing he did. When he couldn't afford to spend any more time on me since the killer was probably out looking for his next victim he told me not to do anything until the case was over at least, said I might still remember something that would help catch Darcy's killer. I ended up going back to the lab I used for class and diving into work, I didn't have a lot but I'd seen the files during the interrogation to start with. It was four in the morning when I called Gibbs in a frenzy. I'd figured something out, maybe even that one key thing. Some stuff happened and Gibbs caught the guy. Before he left he told me not to do anything stupid, and when I graduated to come to D.C. He'd have a job waiting for me. I graduated, I came, I had caf-pow. A few years later I met you."

"wow, Abbs"

"Explains much no?" Abby said with a slightly forced laugh that faded as a realization sank in. They'd talked about Gibbs. More than just at a passing they'd talked about him and done it without avoiding his name or anything.

"You get better…" Tony muttered quietly, quoting a movie he was too preoccupied to care about.

"yeah…" Abby said. "I guess we do."

**2036 hours 5th day**

"ACK!" Abby said the next time she called, not even paying attention to Tony's latest ruse. "I can't talk. I have a date I forgot about! I'm not dead or anything!"

The line cut off before Tony could respond.

**2143 Hours 6th Day**

"Hello, Anthony Dinozzo's Social Secretary, who's calling please?"

"Tony, when you don't even change your voice it's obvious."

"Sore throat" He explained simply. "Doing my best."

"Aww, poor Tony. Is it allergies? Have you tried salt water?"

"Salt water?"

"You gurgle it. Haven't you ever had a sore throat before?"

"Not since I had my tonsils out as a kid" Tony replied simply. "All I remember is ice-cream."

"Well you gurgle salt water. It's good for sore throats." There was a pause and he could hear her rolling across the floor of the lab on a chair. He refrained from asking what she was doing there, his throat really did hurt a lot. "Have you ever thought about the word gurgle? It's really funny, an onomatopoeia. Not many realize that."

"Your happy."

"My date last night was amazing! He took me to that Plastic Death concert, which makes me wonder why I can hear you cause I didn't wear earplugs like I should of but they're kinda gross and might of grossed him out which would have been sad. I mean it would have been like 'thank you so much for taking me to the concert. Wait let me take out my ear waxed earplugs before you answer.' and that is never cool. And I think this is the guy Tony, that Law of big Numbers finally paying off guy and if it was ruined because of earwax…"

"It's okay Abbs" Tony assured her before she got into a longer ramble.

"This guy is really great though. He's a criminal pathologist and…" Her voice died. "I probably should let you go. If you really have Swedish Tulip throat or whatever you should get some rest."

"thanks Abbs"

**2129 hours 7th Day**

"Tony?" Abby asked "Tony?"

Silence was the only answer.

"Can't talk?"

More silence.

"Anyone there?"

Somewhere in the background the TV turned on, a obscure musical played with characters singing "Catch up some other time"

"Okay then, um… talk to you tomorrow"

2049 hours 8th Day

"Stockholm Medical ward"

"Feeling better Tony?"

"Much."

"Did you…"

"Gurgle salt water? Yeah Check the sea level next time you get a chance I think it's gone down a couple of feet. How are things on your end?"

And Abby was off. "Ooh! Sister Roseta actually came bowling with the team and did okay. Ziva made us all breakfast yesterday and we ate it at your desk with Ducky and Palmer."

"Hold on, she made breakfast? Why doesn't she make breakfast when I'm there?"

"She made eggs and waffles and even made bacon for the rest of us."

"Bacon?" He said, trying to stop his mouth from watering. His throat was feeling better but he hadn't really been eating many solid foods for a couple of days.

"I always figured you as a steak and eggs guy."

"I'm hungry Abbs, don't torment me."

"Then go get some food. I read about this cool bar that's open all night, you could probably still go to it. It's called Medici's"

"I'm just gonna order room service, I was waiting for your call."

"Aw, but you should go eat, or call and eat or something like that."

"Nothing else to report?" Tony asked, the missed day yesterday making him take an extra moment to make sure Abby was okay.

"No Sir!"

**2133 hours 9th Day**

"Hello, poorly planned attempt to convince you I'm not actually Tony."

"It's getting kind of sad you know."

"Well the conference has been getting kinda busy lately. Four meetings today, plus a workshop on disarming IEDs"

"Really?"

"I only wish the last part was true, maybe stop Ziva from showing off so much."

"We're actually getting pretty busy here." Abby said. "I'm working late. Remember that soap case?"

"The clean bomb one?" Tony asked, a little intrigued.

"Well we found some weird finger prints." She paused a beat for dramatic effect. "I think we might be dealing with Mutants."

"Really Abbs?"

"Well I found what I thought was fingerprints on the door only it wasn't a print."

"huh?"

"Weird no? It was a print but you know all those useful swirls and whirls and all that? Nothing? Whoever this is they've got nothing."

"could have been a MiB, Man in Black, you know from that movie with Will Smith?"

"And the really loose understanding of the laws of physics?" Abby interjected.

"Sounds about right, anyway they burned the fingerprints off the agents."

"One sec." Abby said, Tony could hear her calling to someone who'd just entered the lab. "Tony thinks it was a Man in Black." She came back onto the phone a second later. "The director says hello." Tony winced, not the person he wanted to have hear that. "Anyway, looks like I need to get back to work. Better luck with useful seminars tomorrow."

**0321 Hours 11th Day**

Tony awoke instantly when the phone rang. He'd fallen to sleep with his hand wrapped around it waiting for Abby to call. When she hadn't called he'd been concerned. When she hadn't picked up he'd grown worried. He'd just dozed off waiting for her when the phone rang. "Abby?"

"Hey Tony" She said, not sounding anywhere as upbeat as she normally did. "Sorry to call so late."

"Don't apologies Abbs. What's wrong?"

"Nothing I just… I worked all night on the mutant case and took a nap in my lab and slept a lot longer and…" Abby trailed off, taking a deep breath trying to calm herself down. "Nothing. Sorry for waking you up. Call you later tonight."

"Abby." Tony said firmly. "Whats wrong?"

"Nothing! Just… I dreamt about him Tony." She finally admitted. "This mutant print is the only lead we have and I just can't get anywhere and I was really tired and frustrated and I took a nap and he was there… telling me it was okay. That it was just soap. I could smell the sawdust Tony! It was like he was there and I just…" Her voice faded. "I miss him. I thought I would stop but I miss him."

Tony swallowed hard, the sound of bert farting over the phone still pulling a smile to his lips. "Me too Abbs." He sighed again, considering for only a moment before continuing. "Back when you woke me up that night in the hospital I'd been dreaming about him and that damn boat of his." Tony chuckled softly. "He kept telling me I'd do, that he'd be back if we really needed him but we were doing fine." He sighed. "I want to say that bastards still with us weather we want him or not."

Another fart from Bert. "You didn't look happy when I woke you up. You looked scared."

Tony thought back, remembering that dream. "I was watching that TV in Gibbs basement and then you came on looking lost then this redhead and little girl came on and started leading you away. I was sure it was Shannon and Kelly, that way you know stuff in dreams, and it didn't seem good that they were leading you."

"oh." Abby said. "That again."

"Again?"

"First sign of that connection." Abby explained joking half a moment before sighing. "When I met Gibbs… during the case some things happened. I um… nearly got a little killed?"

"Nearly a little?"

"I sorta flatlined a couple of seconds." Abby said, sounding a bit more embarrassed than anything else. "And I kinda had one of those out of body experience things? I know it's just the brains reaction to the deprivation of oxygen but it was really weird. I was playing hide and seek with this red headed little girl for awhile before her mother told me I had to go back, that it wasn't time for Oblivion to have me yet and that if it took me it would claim another. So I went back and when I woke up Gibbs was there. I never told him but I guess I sorta always knew about Shannon and Kelly."

A long silence followed the admission. A little while before the clocked turned to 4:00 Abby asked, almost too softly for Tony to be sure it wasn't his imagination. "Do you think he's ever coming back?"

Tony sighed. "I don't know. Somehow, my gutt tells me if we ever really need him he will show up again and make a second B out of himself. I don't know if I could get a hit on him but I'm pretty sure I'd try."

Abby let go a long breath before answering. "Can I be the one to try?" She said finally. "I mean I'd hug him right after and handcuff him to something so he couldn't run off again but I think I deserve that right?" She squeezed Bert. "But until then we'll be okay. We've been okay for awhile havn't we?"

"I think so Abbs."

"Hey Tony, get some sleep. I'm not gonna call again. See you when you get home okay?" She didn't explain why but Tony didn't really need her to. She'd been leaning on him since Gibbs left,. He didn't mind since he'd leaned right back, but she was ready to move on. They'd had their time to fall apart and to pull themselves back together. She'd been as alright as she ever was for a couple months but he'd been waiting to see when she realized it. She was ready to let go of that lifeline and continue that crazy thing she called her life on her own like she had been. A little assistance now and then but he knew she'd survive it.

"See you in a few days then Abbs." Tony said with a little smile. "And don't stress about the mutant. "

"Night Tony"


End file.
